Gay marriage causes rift between Aruba, Holland

The hostility eventually led Charlene and Esther Oduber-Lamers to flee the Dutch territory, which refused to recognise their marriage even though the couple legally wed in Holland four years ago.

"I couldn’t sleep anymore," Charlene, a 33-year-old Aruba native, said in a phone interview from Holland, where the couple has been living since November. "I felt like maybe they wanted to kill us."

Now the women are locked in a legal battle with Aruba’s government to win acceptance of their union in a case that could reach the Supreme Court and force Aruba to recognise gay marriages from Holland.

Their struggle has ignited strong emotions among locals who oppose same-sex marriage, highlighting a deep cultural rift between liberal Holland and its former Caribbean colony.

Gay marriage was a leading topic of debate in Aruba until recently, when the issue was eclipsed by the search for Natalee Holloway, a US teenager who vanished on May 30 after leaving a bar with three local men on the final night of a high school graduation trip to the island.

After the public registry rejected their marriage certificate, the couple sued Aruba’s government for discrimination and a court on the island ruled that their union should be recognised.

A judge is to rule on a government appeal of that decision on August 23, but authorities have vowed to take the matter to the Supreme Court in the Netherlands if necessary, arguing the issue strikes at the very heart of Aruban life.

"If we accept gay marriage, would we next have to accept Holland’s marijuana bars and euthanasia?" said Ruben Trapenberg, spokesman for Aruban prime minister Nelson Oduber. "They have their culture, we have ours."

Aruba, a former Dutch colony off the northern coast of Venezuela, is an autonomous republic that forms part of the Kingdom of the Netherlands.

Dutch statutes require that all members of the Kingdom — Aruba, Holland and the Dutch Antilles — recognise each other’s legal documents, including marriage certificates.

Holland legalised gay marriage in 2001, but Aruba’s government argues that Dutch law also grants the island the right to self-rule — permitting it not to recognise same-sex unions.

"We can’t let this become a precedent," said Hendrik Croes, a lawyer for Aruba’s government. "Gay marriage is against the civil code and Aruban morals."

Though Aruba’s gay marriage debate hinges on a dispute over law, differences in culture are a major factor.

Despite strong ties to the Netherlands, Aruba shares more with Latin America than Europe.

While Dutch is the official language, most Arubans speak Papiamento, a mix of Spanish and Portuguese. More than 80 percent of the island’s 97,000 people are Catholic, and the largest number of immigrants come from nearby Venezuela and Colombia.

Few people are openly gay on the island, where locals say many homosexuals move to Holland rather than face persecution at home.

"Being gay is still taboo in Aruba," said Guisette Croes, 41, a lesbian who owns a music store in the capital, Oranjestad. "You have Dutch law here, but you also have conservative Latin American people."

Charlene says she knew winning recognition of her marriage wouldn’t be easy.

Not having their marriage recognised meant Esther, a 38-year-old Dutch citizen, couldn’t get health benefits from Charlene’s job or stay on the island for more than six months a year under Aruban immigration laws.

It also meant she wouldn’t get custody of the couple’s two-year-old daughter should something happen to Charlene, who gave birth to the child with an implanted egg from Esther.

After filing their lawsuit, people began to heckle them and make critical remarks on the street, in the supermarket or at Charlene’s job at the Aruban Department of Social Affairs. Walking downtown in the capital, Oranjestad, someone threw rocks at them and their tyres were slashed outside a hotel.

The couple received public support from Dutch gay rights groups and a liberal political party in the Netherlands, the D-66, but local organisations kept a much lower profile. The main Aruban gay rights organisation declined to comment on the issue, saying they didn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to their cause.

Charlene said that stress over their case caused her to have anxiety attacks, and in May she was fired from her government job after not returning from medical leave in Holland. She was put back on the payroll after threatening to sue.