Why the personal touch will never die

It’s debatable if arguing ever does any good when shopping, in fact, if it descends to that level you have probably already passed the stage of appealing to someone’s better nature, and they are unlikely to cave in just because you are angry.

Online the question doesn’t arise. You can still get annoyed, but questioning a web page’s parentage isn’t going to get you anywhere.

Before the confrontational stage is reached, what the online experience often offers is the concept of FAQs – frequently asked questions. Many of us, though, rarely find what we’re looking for in these lists. They are a non-interactive version of the long-distance help-desks manned by people who don’t understand your problem because they can’t picture who and where you are.

Thus, when based in the UK I phoned a newspaper in the British Virgin Islands to book an advert for an international recruitment firm, and when it came to payment arrangements, I was invited to “swing by on the way home”.

Similarly, being based in the Caribbean but still having a UK bank account, one can be blithely invited to pick up a new card reader from the branch where the account was opened – once one has been interrogated as to how the old one came to be lost in the first place.

Seeing the caller’s life in her own context, the young woman providing the “customer interface” can’t imagine how anyone can lose such an item, which she sees or refers to every day of her working life but to you is a rarely used inconvenience. How can it go missing between where she keeps hers (in the little white chest of drawers with the gold, scrolly handles in her bedroom) and the settee in the lounge where everyone obviously conducts such business while watching TV and eating Doritos? Little does she know that some people have repeatedly packed and unpacked theirs along with the biros, earphones, old keys and boxes of staples that form part of their “office”, and hauled the suitcase containing that particular plastic bag through customs, in and out of taxis and up endless flights of stairs in whichever building in whichever location is to be home for what might be only a matter of months.

This line of thought leads to the inherently happy, peaceful activity of buying flowers. When you don’t know a good florist who does deliveries and is reliable, it’s tempting to just hit Google and allow the possibilities to be paraded before you.

This wasn’t a Valentine’s Day thing; I wanted to say thank you to two sisters who had helped me out, and although admittedly I don’t know them particularly well, there is never any sign or even talk of a man in their lives.

Call me old-fashioned (or sexist, or patronizing if you’re that way inclined), but I think most women like to be given flowers from time to time. In fact once, many years ago, I found myself flying into a florist’s on no specific occasion, just because a new female friend had told me no one had ever – not once in all her 30-something years – given her that little acknowledgement of her femininity.

So I thought it would be nice for the sisters to receive a floral tribute from a grateful friend.

Google found me someone who would do that for a minimum of US$89, rising well into three figures if I wanted something less basic.

I scoffed and slammed the door on their page. Then I saw a company offering the same sort of thing for US$45, which is still quite a lot in my humble opinion, but at least I wouldn’t be contributing to these people’s retirement fund quite so foolishly.

Entering the details, I progressed to the final page, where they casually dropped in the delivery fee of US$35. Where were these people based, I wondered.

Did they service their Caribbean customers by dispatching a Rolls Royce from a gated community by the Thames? Another metaphorical door slammed, I sought advice from local friends and came up with someone who they said would do a good job, including delivery, for a couple of hundred local smackers.

I called him and explained a situation that was simple enough but had come to seem complicated.

Just for extra insurance, I mentioned the name of the people who had recommended him.

Nice guy, same day service and he came to my place to collect the cash.

It feels like a discovery that should be shared w i t h friends.

I’ve got a great idea : don’t it online!