Once again the Greatest Show

THE EDITOR: Well my friends, here we go again. It is that time of year when Trinidad and Tobago is frantically preparing to celebrate what was once the greatest show on earth. I say once was, because here is my perspective on the show as it is today. This now, is that time of year when poison will exchange their beads for Barbarrosa’s feathers. And Legends will exchange their tops for Fantasia’s bottoms. And bandleaders will inform their players that the price of materials has gone up this year. So you know what! This is that time once more when a whole bunch of old men take their sailor suits out of moth balls, sew on a couple extra stripes on the tunics and are convinced that they “come better” this year. And when the arthritis in their knees cause them to limp and to stumble on the Savannah stage, they’ll try to convince the commentator that it’s a new step in the Sailor Dance.

Of course, in the Panorama competition it is a given that the fifth placed band is going to cry foul! Advantage! And in the Calypso Monarch contest, the fourth placed contestant will shout, robbery! Especially if the Mighty Shadow wins the crown with his rendition of ‘Somebody Horn the Horner-Man who horn the horner-man that horn the horner-man. This is that time again when almost every night for about three weeks several thousand people, at $50 or $60 a head will stand in some court yard, packed like sardines looking up at a stage on which a fellow and his female accomplice is exhorting the crowd once again “put ya hand in the air.” After three or four hours of this inane performance, the crowd head home, blissfully unaware that the only difference in the show this year is the fact that the fellow on the stage was able to leap about six inches higher. This is that time again when the Indo-Trinis get to shout discrimination, and insult, over something that an Afro-Trini says or does in a calypso performance. On this theme we’re off to a running start with Denise Belfon in her sari outfit and looking for an Indian man.

Let me also mention the influx of mediocre talent that comes in from our sister islands, make a pocketful of money and then, like Benny Hinn go back home and disparage our people. Thankfully, this year there is one repeat that we will not be subjected to and that is listening to his majesty Peter Minshall telling us once again that he doesn’t play mas, he presents theatre on the street. That’s it folks, the greatest show on earth in a nut shell. Or should I say pappy-show? Whatever. Have fun. Oh, excuse me, I almost forgot the main attraction. A half million near-naked women wining on the streets with wild abandon, many of whom you can visit in a maternity ward come November.

TYRONE EVANS
Port-of-Spain