Give children opportunities to develop talents

I’m talking major milestone - earning his first “paycheck” from a musical gig at his cousin’s sixth birthday party.

Twenty dollars for playing Happy Birthday on the recorder and a $20 tip. “Like Mr Krabs says ‘these are mi _ rst dollars’,” he said with a proud grin as he stashed away his two purple bills.

He was elated and so was I. Him about the money, me about the important lesson he was beginning to learn.

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” -Chinese sage, Confucius.

Parents know only too well how the likes and dislikes, and aspirations of their children change with every passing day. Their plans to be a wrestler to show off their finisher; then a police officer to fight crime; then a professional farter because they can be; then an astronaut to see space; then a YouTuber to get subscriptions; then an Uber driver to not have to wait for a monthly paycheck. The training with that football club they just HAVE to join, until they fall in the grass and they itch all the way home.

I’ve been through quite a few of those must-haves over his lifetime, among them music, Science camp, swimming, football, taekwondo and tennis. Some were costly (many, many pairs of shoes costly) and didn’t last longer than the Red House fire. Yet I continue to allow him to explore his interests, within reason.

So far, I’ve seen consistency in his interest in music, swimming and tennis.

He plays the drum kit, steelpan, African drum, guitar and the recorder, his favourites being the steelpan and the recorder (I see you rolling your eyes). His pan teacher describes him as a “strong player” and his determination to master the recorder is beginning to open small doors (stop rolling those eyes).

He has also indicated his interest in singing calypso and soca, so vocal training will soon be in the works.

He doesn’t swim like a pro yet, but I’m confident he will get there soon enough. He is getting better at tennis. He has a special love for art and craft too. I have to admit, though, he is extremely lacking when it comes to the art part. But I encourage him to do it anyway. Who knows, stick men may soon make a big comeback.

Even before I became a parent I have always believed in giving children opportunities to develop their talents, which was reinforced by an article I read, published by the Child Development Institute and written by child and adolescent psychologist Dr Bob Myers.

“Talents need openings to develop. If no opportunity arises for a skill to flourish, it may remain suppressed throughout a child’s formative years, after which it may be too late to develop it to its full potential. If a kid has a flair for percussion, for example, it may not be set free until he/she gets to bash a drum kit.

It’s important to provide a range of opportunities for your child so that any hidden talents can emerge and blossom. You can do this by introducing him/her to different topics, games, skills and activities, and helping him/her to pursue them.” I firmly believe if my parents had had the time and resources to invest in me when I was his age, in addition to being a journalist, I would have been a world-class pianist and netball player today.

You may be asking, with all that he does, including academics, where does he find time for play? The answer is simple. His extracurricular activities are things he enjoys, so to him they are play. I’m not the millennial mom-type, so I’d prefer to shuttle him to activities he’s excited about than to sit comfortably at home watching him stare at a screen, which unfortunately, is what some children now consider play.

And when it comes to his academics, with which he has a love/hate relationship, it’s all about time management and compromises. We have developed a system that works well for the both of us, at least most of the time.

On weekdays home work is usually done by 5:30 pm, after which anything can happen - play on devices, talk, watch a movie, argue, play outside, colour, practice music, water the plants, stare at the walls, fart - until bath time at eight, story time thirty minutes later, followed by hugs and kisses, one last fart joke and lights out at nine. Monday’s home work is done on Saturday. Sunday is his free day to do whatever he pleases.

So when those recorder gigs come rolling in (you won’t be rolling those eyes when he makes the recorder big in TT and beyond), whatever day of the week, it most certainly will be work without the work.