Inside story on English victory in Media Centre

An English publishing house has sent me a copy of a new paperback book just out on sports. With it came a note that stated: “We take pleasure in presenting you with this review copy and ask that you please send two copies of your views to our offices.” I seldom, in fact, I have only reviewed a book once in my weekly commentary in Dancing Brave. At this time the newspaper does not have a sports book review column, but I am certain, they are working on that. So in this case, I will again make an exception. The book is called, If at first  with a subtitle that says, “With the exclusive inside story of how the English are planning victory in the media box in the upcoming Test series against the West Indies”

The authors are Tony Greig, Geoffrey Boycott, Bob Willis, Ian Botham, David Gower, Mike Gatting, Chris Cowdrey and Michael Atherton, all seated comfortably in the Gerry Gomes Media Centre. Actually, they didn’t write it —-some professional ghostwriter did. But the words and the story originated from them. I will begin my review by saying that this is a very solid book. The moment I opened the package and saw what it was about, I threw it against my office wall as hard as I could. Then I slammed it to the floor and jumped up and down on it. I beat on it with a chair for several minutes until I slumped onto my chair, emotionally and physically drained. Although slightly scuffed, the book was still intact.

It is also a book that can cause excitement. I dropped it on the lap of a former senior Press Officer with the West Indies Cricket Board and it stirred him to emotional heights and he shouted: “Why are you giving me this so and so book, with the writings of (deleted) English tabloid rejects now writing for the Daily Telegraph, The Sun, the Mirror and the Independent.  Who really cares about the so and so English media and so and so England team, the whole so and so members of the West Indies Cricket Board that continue to allow this so and so rubbish to happen. Even those Reuters and Associated Press people are afraid of real sports journalism, more like (deleted) sports puppets. And so and so you too.”

Then he flung it against a wall and gave it a kick, but it still was intact. I told you it was a solid book. It’s a book that can move a sensitive reader to tears, as I noticed when I passed the book onto a old lady who adores West Indies cricket and has been traveling to matches since the 1950s, but who since 1995 has been seeing only darkness in West Indies cricket. When she looked at the cover, she choked back a sob, a tear trickled down her cheek and she said: “ Why them? Why not us? What was our sin? How can we atone for it?

You know I asked the pundit about this, and he said he wished he knew the answer to, because he lost $100 betting against their so and so team.” And it is a powerful book as reviewers like to say, it can hit you right in the gut, as I experienced when I showed it to a former West Indies captain who said,” Excuse me, while I throw up.” But enough of generalities let us consider the contents of the book. On page five of the book, Marks, Atherton or a ghostwriter states: “We had the West Indies covered early. Those guys like a party, and they made it easy on us.

From that victory onwards we have not looked back...boo hoo hoo to the Bajan and Guyanese liaison officers who want to give the best seats to their people.” On another note, can anyone explain why David Bernard Jr was not selected to play in Jamaica-a Test match we consequently lost and why Jermaine Lawson continues to still be missing in action?