The Top Five in world of sports

Space, I understand is now a premium in the Sunday Newsday as the advertising revenue grows. So in a good show of cooperation and teamwork, I will acquiesce and reduce my word spillage on this page for fear of reprisals. So with that in mind here are the High Five reasons rationale to the World of Sport.

Top five reasons for being a Caribbean sports journalist:
1- You will always get only three pages out of 32 for sport and even then each page will have an advertisement
2- Never have funds in that kitty for any overseas trips and there will always be more foreign press officers at West Indies matches in your own backyard
3- Scarcely place your news on the front page, even if it is better than most of the general front page news
4- Always find jealously and backbiting among colleagues from other media houses as well as own media house (print/radio/television)
5- Scarcely any chance for promotion

Top five reasons for being a Trinidadian footballer fan:
1- Expect your national team to be knocked out of the early  World Cup rounds  at some stage, amidst a lot of dissent and acrimony
2- Expect though that when they are playing non World Cup matches, they can be the best in the region
3- Expect nothing from the foreign based professionals, but false promises and a lot of ghosting internet old talk
4- You can think that you belong to the best Caribbean football team
5-  When you are not.

Top five reasons  for being a West Indian cricketer:
1- Sleeping alone on tours is no longer compulsory, now you have insects for company
2- No need to worry about winning any match
3- You can live in the past and allow your management to behave as if you are still world champions
4- Scoring less than 200 in every innings — whether you need to or not
5- Ditto, capturing ten of your opponents’ wickets in less than three days
Top five reasons for being an
 Indian basketball player:
1- Chicken Madras sponsorship
2- Popadoms Benefit Year
3- Onion Bhaji  Negotiations
4- Kingfisher Lager donation
5 -Lamb Passanda Accreditation
 
Top five reasons for being a Rugby player:
1- Carib Beer
2- Special parking facilities, lanes and if allowed traffic lights for children’s bicycles
3- Not embarrassed to wear short pants when you are over 50
4- You can play a game of golf before another round on rugby
5- More Carib Beer for free as your bar never closes
Top five reasons for being a golfer:
1- Get to wear the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care
2- Get to relive childhood days, and play with sand in a bag (sand bagger)
3- If you can breathe calmly, then the old guys in front of you won’t bother you all that much
4- You can allow others to confuse people with the rules of golf
5- It just beats playing rounders

Top five reasons for being Jamaican:
1- When speaking fast you can sound gay
2- Yet to experience the joy of winning the World Cup
3- Get to travel to another Caribbean country and criticise without reprisals everything — food, football and the lack of fortune from low gates receipts, especially after so much was spent on the cause.
4- Control West Indies cricket, and soon if possible the entire region, with reggae the national anthem in all countries.
5- Have players with soft under bellies, like Nehemiah Perry and Michael Holding, who need assistance in performing everyday relieving.

Top five reasons for swimming feud:
1- Women cannot live without men
2- But men can live alone, except on weekends
3- Not much choice
4- Women want to play with the men
5- Money talks, bull....  walks
 
Top five reasons for  going to the gym:
1- Meet pretty, but fat ladies
2- Meet pretty ladies who think they are fat
3- Meet and match your needs fully
4- Watch women only on adduction machine
5- Meet several media people in need of losing weight from excessive eating at functions

Top five reasons for being a horse-racing punter:
1- Get to bet and not view or listen to races
2- Get to be burnt to the ground, with no fire extinguishers on premises
3- Get to use bucket of water to dip your hands when water is gone, in the bathrooms
4- Get to bet in front some of the ugliest tellers in the world
5- Get to lose, even when you win?

Now as for Dancing Brave, his five reasons for being who he is:
1- Really cares a lot for every woman  and child
2- Fearless One is coming, so too some Newsday gifts.
3- It is my late Father (Errol’s birthday this week), and he has to be at his best in behaviour (Happy to have known you)
4- Needs to keep his fingers fit, for other nocturnal activities
5-Hoping to become a film star some day soon
For the best website management and change management check cornelis-associates.com