Beneath the mask

In the remote rural town of Ballyjamesduff in the Republic of Ireland, residents awoke on Tuesday morning to the news that the deputy principal of the local primary school had stabbed and chopped his wife to death, then his three sons and then hung himself. His wife was also a primary school teacher. School reopened that morning.

The horror and similarity between these events 6,000 miles apart is indescribable.

They elicit similar bewilderment, but the overriding question is why? There are often economic reasons for tragedies such as these, in particular in the aftermath of the 2008 meltdown in Ireland. It is therefore somehow ironic that the day after the news of this gruesome event, the EU Commission would rule that Ireland was guilty of giving unfair tax breaks to the giant corporation Apple and that Apple would have to pay Ireland 13 billion euro in back taxes.

Even more ironic as austerity lingers, is the fact that the Government has recalled the D?il (parliament) to discuss an appeal against the EU decision, a matter that, needless to say, has split public opinion. The fact is that ordinary taxpayers over the past eight years have suffered untold distress as a result of the recession. Yet huge multinationals are now seen to reap unbelievable profits because of loopholes in tax regulations.

But economics seem to have played little part in the two murder- suicides. Instead they fall at the extreme end of the spectrum of domestic and child abuse. Such forms of abuse are often silent and exist in the most unlikely homes.

One of the interesting similarities in both the Irish and the Trinidadian case is that both couples appear, according to reported comments by neighbours, to have given the general impression that they were in an ideal relationship. According to one neighbour in Ballyjamesduff, “You never heard a word from the house.” There are documented examples of couples who appear to be in near perfect relationships, but who mask issues of spousal control. Silence may sometimes hide psychological, emotional or physical abuse.

Seventy per cent of murder-suicides reveal some form of abuse previously. Men perpetuate 91 per cent of these murders. The growth in these tragedies has led to a new name: “familicide” There is always the possibility that both incidents were the culmination of hidden spousal abuse. But the evidence does not appear to suggest this kind of long-term abuse in these particular cases.

Commentaries and research on the growing “phenomenon” suggest that murder-suicides may be linked to depression. This suggests the need to talk about depression and the effects it may have on the individual.

The issue here is not attributing blame, but building an environment where mental illness and the repercussions for families are recognised.

People at risk need spaces where they can talk freely and without stigma.

There have also been calls in many parts of the world for family involvement in mental health treatment.

According to one expert, the most common type of killer is the possessively jealous type. The term “over enmeshment” is used to describe the relationship where the individual, having decided he will commit suicide, cannot bear to leave his family behind because he sees them as an extension of himself.

There are individuals for whom there are no boundaries and who cannot separate their needs from that of their wives and children. This sometimes leads to them venting their own anger or even frustration from the workplace on their families.

One cause of the psychological break in Ballyjamesduff may have been issues at work.

Trincity residents have described themselves as “close-knit”. The young man who killed himself and his family in Ireland was very much an active part of his community. He was treasurer of the local GAA football club and had spent the Sunday out with his family at a community event.

The matter seems to go deeper than social interaction and suggests that in our contemporary world individuals increasingly build walls around themselves, even in the midst of social activity. There is a secret part of our lives that remains well hidden from public scrutiny and this increasing isolation is what we need to understand and examine.

One imagines that there must be signs that indicate that a person is at risk. How does a young successful professional take a knife to wife and sons without any warning? Why does a quiet, apparently gentle man feel the need not only to kill himself but his wife and children? What is the catalyst for such actions? In crime-ridden Trinidad it is becoming almost commonplace to hear of men killing their partners. But that does not take away the responsibility for assessing the root causes.

Who knows what is simmering beneath the mask of those we meet and know? According to a close neighbour who met Blackburn shortly before he shot himself in Trincity, the 57-year-old was in a jovial mood.

Nothing indicated that he had shot his wife. The Garda (police) spokesman at the scene of the murder-suicide in I r e l a n d made a s t r a n g e comment that sums it all up: “ T h e t r u t h , ” he said, “lies within these walls.”