The Importance of True Friendship

On Saturday night I was trying to figure out what to write this week. There are so many things requiring comment! I could plead with the government to assist the people of this country, but what would be the point? So, I decided to consult one of my “more intelligent” friends and try to get him, to come up with a topic. So what did this “intelligent friend” come up with? He asked me to write about “the greatness of lesbianism.” So much for an intelligent response! Then it hit me! I should write about friends. No, not the recently cancelled TV show, but the people who make you laugh in your darkest hour.

After my family, friends are the next most important part of my life. To quote an old cliche, friends can make you and friends can break you and over the years there were a few who tried to break me, but when God is genuinely, and I stress, genuinely your source, nothing and no one can break you! At this point in my life, my friends are very few, but very, very dear to me. In the period from primary school to today, I have had many friends with whom I could laugh, friends with whom I could cry and friends with whom I could just sit in silence. Through the years I have lost contact with many of them with only two remaining close and very dear to me… these two are friends that I have known since primary school.

These are the friends for whom I would risk my life. I feel their pain whenever they cry or feel sad. Their names are Shellie and Phoebe. Shellie’s  grandfather died last week and I attended the funeral. Now, she was as close to her grandfather as I was to mine… he was my world. At the funeral, everyone seemed to be so strong, particularly my dear friend. So, I went up to her and gave her a hug, and at that point tears welled up in her eyes. The funny part is, I began to cry even before she did, and I don’t mean just tears running out my eyes, I mean cry to the point where I couldn’t speak. Everyone was probably thinking: “Is this girl crazy? Did her grandfather die? Is he (the man in the coffin) her grandfather?”

But no, I was not going crazy. It’s just that I knew what she felt having been through that myself.  I knew what she was going through, the pain, anger, frustration and the deep loss that she felt. Well, I must say the tables did turn. Instead of me making sure that she was okay, Shellie asked me if I thought I could cope. This is what friendship is about. She is a true friend! Friends are the ones who know how to lift you up when you are at your lowest point in your life. Friends are the ones who can cry with you. Being able to tell someone what you feel about a particular situation is quite difficult at times, but when you have friends like Shellie and you begin talking to them, your problems take on a different meaning and solutions become obvious.

There is nothing that I can hide from her. True friends like her are quite hard to find. What I have found to be quite amazing is how sometimes you think someone is your friend and then that person turns out to be a back-stabbing… you figure it out. Take Gillian Lucky and Basdeo Panday, for example. Lucky probably thought Panday and her fellow UNC candidates would have supported her and not want her to compromise her integrity. Poor thing! She was so wrong. The point I am trying to make here folks, is that you should be careful when choosing your friends.

You need to be certain that they are true. Jealous friends are the worst kind to have... I’ve had one of those and trust me, they can ruin your life. We need friends, no matter where you are or at what point you are in life, friends are always needed. Whether it’s just to hang out, or whether it’s to talk, cry or laugh, friends are necessary. I am quite lucky to have friends like Shellie and my “more intelligent” friend and I hope every one has at least one person you can talk to and one person you can trust. It is quite necessary, not only to enjoy life but to live successfully. It does not come easily but it is quite important to have someone you can call a friend.