A World Cup dictionary

Angola: Pure underdog outsiders, with a glorious chance to knock off their old colonial occupiers — Portugal — in their opening game on Sunday. World Cup minnows by anyone’s reckoning, but this is a tournament where the small fish often have ravenous appetites, and big teeth.

Argentina: With so many questions dogging Europe’s best hopes, pampas prodigy Lionel Messi could easily lead his lads into a July 9 final with Brazil. But they must focus and concentrate their efforts, because their strong opening group will punish any napping.

Australia: They’ve made such a big deal about finally getting here, but all they really did was survive a penalty shootout against Uruguay. The Aussies have wonderful players and an infectiously positive attitude. But they haven’t faced real adversity yet, and there’ll be nothing less but from here on in.

Brazil: If it were Ronaldinho and a ten-piece salsa band, they’d probably still have a chance. This is the deepest, most talented roster on the planet, and their best and most astonishingly creative player plays with a huge smile on his face. Clear favourites, and it will take total effort for anyone to derail them.

Costa Rica: Canada fans will be watching these guys with a wistful feeling of “what if?” because the Ticos claimed the No3 regional qualifying spot our lads were always dreaming of. Four years ago, they had the heart and courage to run with Brazil. They lost 5-2, but that’s still their best tactical way forward.

Croatia: You can count on them for dour defence, but watch out for a blazing counterbreak through the middle. Croatia are what happens when stony sternness meets free-flowing fun. It’s awkward, and it’s unusual, but you don’t want to be playing these guys with the future of your World Cup on the line.

Czech Republic: Legitimate longshot contenders. If the Czechs play with the same all- out thunder they showed in Euro ‘04 - to heck with the scoreboard, let’s just attack their six-yard box all day and all night — they have an outside chance to be the last European team standing at World Cup ‘06.

Ecuador: Any team that qualifies out of South America is a dangerous, dangerous opponent. In no region on earth is it harder just to get this far. It looks bleak for them in a group with Germany, Poland and Costa Rica. But a win and two draws will get them through, and they can, in fact, achieve that.

England: I love them, and I’d love to jump on the England-Brazil-in-the-final bandwagon. I can’t. England’s tactics have been artificially limiting them for the best part of four decades, and while this is clearly their best chance for global glory since they won it all in 1966, I strongly fear disaster awaits.

France: They were too old, so they got younger. Then they started losing, and all the old guys came back. Then they qualified, and now the old guys are openly defying and disrespecting the coach. They’ll advance from their group, but betting against Les Bleus is a fine investment opportunity.

Germany: Hosts and defending finalists, but really not that good — by their standards, or by anybody else’s. They got a favourable draw, but they’re taking on three extremely tough and competent sides. They need to be luckier than they were in 2002 — and that’s not mathematically possible.

Ghana: In which one star Chelsea player — Michael Essien — attempts to lead his humble nation to glory in their World Cup debut. Ghana faces Italy, the Yanks and the Czechs in what I think is the real Group of Death. It looks bad, but in a tournament of ringing upsets, they could have some major fun.

Iran: The players may be largely unfamiliar, their nation far from a soccer power, but there’s one thing you know you are always going to get from Iran: solid, honest effort on the pitch. In a group with potential under-achievers like Portugal and Mexico, it is more than merely possible they can advance.

Italy: Offence and replaced defence. Creating goals is now more important than destroying entire games. Italy could rise again to their rightful place in the highest echelon of world football, or they could get scared and selfish, and throw it all away all over again. Looks like a coin toss to me.

Ivory Coast: In which one star Chelsea player — Didier Drogba — attempts to lead his humble nation to glory in their World Cup debut. Ivory Coast faces Argentina, Holland and Serbia/Montenegro in the Group of Death. It looks bad, but in a tournament of ringing upsets, they could have some major fun.

Japan: Their new coach and system, stresses individual initiative over robotic team play. The players seem to be responding with confusion and doubt.

They may be the best team in all of Asia, but Malta just frightened the sushi out of them in a drab, disappointing friendly. A team in decline.

Mexico: Not only did they fall short of the quarterfinals four years ago, it was their arch-rivals the Americans who stopped them from getting there. The Mexicans are always capable of shutting down any strong opponent’s World Cup drive, though. Portugal cannot be looking forward to playing them.

Continues tomorrow

Netherlands: Is this the year the World Cup finally goes Dutch? Oh, man, they’re gonna try! What’s a Group of Death when you didn’t even qualify four years ago? Netherlands-Argentina should be the showcase game of the entire first round, and the Dutch have every reason to believe they can win it.

Paraguay: As stated in the Ecuador comment, no bad team ever qualifies from South America. The Paraguayans will believe they can run with England in the first round. Outrun them, in fact. The Brits may have deeper talent, but Paraguayan passion may prevail. Another team you don’t want to have to play.

Poland: Like Croatia, the Poles believe there is still room for discipline and defence in this hard-running, attacking new century of soccer. Their conservative 4-4-2 formation is built for efficiency, but there’s certainly enough talent here to score goals when they are really needed. Old-school outsiders.

Portugal: Prove it, guys! Take all that talent, all that speed, your oceans of creativity and flair, and turn it into a World Cup run to remember. They were so close to winning it all at Euro ‘04, but the Greeks baffled them with relentless hard word and discipline in the final. There are no more excuses. It’s time!

Saudi Arabia: Ah, but weak teams sure do sneak in from Asia now and then, don’t they? The Saudi’s 7-0 loss to Germany four years ago raised global issues — like how come South America doesn’t get more qualifying spots? The Saudis should do better this time, but are a long way from ever contending.

Serbia & Montenegro: Okay, tabloid fans. Here’s a country playing the World Cup in the midst of a break-up. Mercifully, Brad Pitt’s not involved. But Montenegro has hired divorce lawyers, and is moving out at first opportunity. That said, everyone raves about this team’s unity, and they could do well.

South Korea: Credit where credit is due: the Koreans were semi-finalists four years ago. Yeah, they were playing at home. Yeah, the refs pretty much beat Italy for them. But for heart, passion and a rollicking good time, you couldn’t beat them. Now you can, and the world is about to — repeatedly.

Spain: In a year where Europe’s mightiest all have significant, potentially tragic flaws, the Spaniards are flying under the radar, looking to surprise the world. This is their traditional role, of course, and the path might finally be clear for them to excel. No team, for example, has an easier opening round.

Sweden: As always, they’ll go as far as honest hard work can carry them. The Swedes can stand with pretty much anyone on any given day, but it’s rarely pretty. They can create dazzling goals through Ibrahimovic and Larsson, and then get bundled out by Senegal. They need to beat Paraguay to advance.

Switzerland: Two nervous draws with France in qualifying, and now look who’s waiting for them in Group G? If you believe, as I do, that France is finished, the Swiss could have their best tournament since their quaterfinal run in 1954. Beat Turkey to qualify — and Turkey made the semis in 2002.

Togo: A brilliant Cinderella story when they qualified, but it’s been nothing but pumpkins ever since. They can’t beat anybody, and what little team spirit remains is being shredded in an ugly dispute about performance bonuses. No one’s expecting anything now — so look out if they get their form back.

Trinidad & Tobago: What a happy story this is becoming. Former Manchester United striker Dwight Yorke leads an ecstatic band of lower-division scrappers into a dream match against England in the opening round. Unlikely to get any results, but they could set the tone for the whole tournament if they do.

Tunisia: Not particularly charismatic, but there’s a reliable efficiency to their football. Africa’s most experienced representative (the others are all first-timers), Tunisia could qualify from Group H if they beat Ukraine, and everything else falls just right. Possibly the blandest African team — and likely the best.

Ukraine: Lone survivors of a qualifying groups that included Greece, Turkey and Demark, Ukraine was drawn into the World Cup’s weakest group, and have an excellent chance of moving on. There’s a real desire to prove they belong, and Andriy Shevchenko up front is clearly the real deal.

United States: The world has had a very hard time accepting that the Americans are a consistent top-ten team in the global soccer rankings, despite their quarterfinal appearance four years ago. They play efficiently, with decent creativity, and can score goals in bunches. Could shock the world — or exit early.I wish everyone thrilling soccer, and an amazing World Cup experience.

Onward!