Lady Africa

“Had this year’s topic at the Extempo finals been remotely sensible,” Leslie-Ann Bristow, popularly known as Lady Africa assured, she would have done better. “‘Did you buy or eat any stew dog?’ It was a stupid topic. I really couldn’t get down to that intelligence level. Up to now my brain can’t absorb it, because it was so idiotic. Stewed dogs? That’s just stupid Trinidadians talking nonsense!” said the extempo bard of 15 years, seven-time WASA (Water and Sewerage Authority) Calypso Monarch and four-time winner of Anyhowers calypso competition.

She had to shelve her criticisms, however, as the competition called for intense battle tapered with tasteful picong. “Whatever I felt about the topic had to take a backseat. If that was the topic, that was what I had to do. It’s just that Sheldon (John) was able to do something better with it.” This year was reminiscent of 1992 and 2002, when she came close to clinching the title, placing second in the competition. No other woman has made it to the finals of the National Extempo Competition and, come 2006, Lady Africa will attempt to set the record of becoming the first woman to win the event. She boasted, “When I win it, they not getting it back.” The Arima resident and mother of two is employed as project technician at WASA.

She conceded defeat to four-time Extempo king, Sheldon John, and has no grouse with the judges’ decision. However, she felt that in previous years, she has been judged unfairly. “Contrary to popular belief, being the only woman in the finals is not an advantage,” she laughed. Not even her baby son’s diagnosis of a mild case of chicken pox, on the night before her face-off with John, stopped her from competing. She vies for the title year after year “because of the prize money and I like extempo; it is challenging. It is the art of composing words or lyrics on the spot on any given subject, and it is supposed to be done in metre (length of each line) and rhyme.” Six verses are required at the national competition.

Picong is not her strong point, she admitted, “and this year I’m working on that.” But her rhymes are spontaneous. As the local saying goes, “she never bust!” on stage. “It’s a gift. It’s a skill, an art,” she said. “You pull a topic and in 30 seconds, as the band chorus plays, you must have a germ of an idea. When you’re singing the first verse, you’re composing the other three — that’s if you’re singing alone. But when you’re at war, you have time to think as the band chorus plays and as the other person sings his verse.” Spontaneous lyrics, too, are a direct result of studying her “rhyming dictionary.” “I would repeat lines like: bring, fling, ling, jing, ping and cat, sat, flat, bat, mat,” she said. “To sing extempo, you must also be knowledgeable on various topics. You read and you listen to the news. From the first of January to Carnival I bought newspapers — all of them. At some point in time it comes like penance. You need to know the facts. You have to be prepared.”

As early as age nine, Lady Africa was showing potential in extemporaneous speech. She had observed the extempo competition on television for the first time. “I was listening to this thing and wondering how everybody knew the song. I had no idea what was going on and I told myself I could do that and I started rhyming to that same Santimanitay (San Humanite) melody. “But I had been writing ever since I was a child. I liked to redesign nursery rhymes and when I was in secondary school, I used to take people’s song and make chants for cheerleading,” said the Holy Name Convent past student.

She credits her past hockey team-mates for registering her in the National Extempo competition in 1990. “I remember seeing the ad on television and I said I had to take part in that, and without my knowing they went and registered me.” She was 23 years old at the time and did not have a clue “of what I was supposed to do.” Nevertheless, she braved the preliminary round. “I remember they put me down as ‘New Discovery’ and I said I didn’t want that name and so they named me ‘Lady Africa’ because of my outfit. I had borrowed a dress from my mother, a kaftan she got from Nigeria, and ah hitch it up on my hip and I had my long braids and high heel shoes; ah fit the part.”

This year she deviated from the typical African garb and opted for a Dawn Victor ensemble, to which she applied a few tucks on the day of the finals. “The theme I picked the first time around was ‘Superstar.’ Right away I thought of sneakers. The most I remember is the first line and when I came off the stage I was...” (With arms outstretched Lady Africa mimics her trembling). “And then Gypsy (Winston Peters), who was in the audience, got up and shook my hand and I thought for him to do that, I must have done alright.” Lady Africa said she had the “utmost respect” for the seasoned extemporaneous champ and his ability. “He has been extremely supportive and I know he respects me as well.”

Failure to make it beyond the preliminary round on her debut performance fired her to return to the event. She will be remembered for her alleged sassy comeback in her duel with Short Pants (Llewelyn Mc Intosh) a few years ago, when she compared the length of his prose to the “diminuitive” length of his privates. She tries to stay clear of “anything political because politics is very iffy. I prefer to keep my political views to myself. When you take the political route your constitutional freedoms are compromised.”