The teacher’s panty in cyber-space

De school-bell ring

De teacher panty tie up

with a string;

De string go pop.”

I’m sure most of my readers know the end of that traditional bit of schoolyard naughtiness. It was popular when I was a kid; and if it’s not still in active usage, I have no doubt it’s been replaced with something similar, and probably worse.

In those days, the way to make fun of your teachers — or classmates — was verbal ; it may have been disrespectful or even a bit cruel (remember “Chinee, Chinee, never die”?), but it was shrugged off as a natural part of growing up.

No one, least of all the teachers, who presumably had more important things to worry about, made an issue of silly verses chanted between giggles at recess. The kids enjoyed their little thrill at being cheeky; then went back to class and sat in respectful rows.

That was then; this is now. And now, here in Toronto, the equivalent of “Ting-a-ling-a-ling” can get a student in a whole lot of trouble, particularly if he makes the mistake of posting it on the Internet. Welcome to a whole new term — cyber-bullying. New to me, at any rate.

I first heard the term back in February, when the principal of a Catholic school in Ontario suspended eleven students for saying mean things about him on Facebook, the latest teen Internet craze. Apparently, they called him the “grinch of school spirit”, after he enforced a district ban on cell phones and iPods, and announced that the school would impose a uniform policy.

The students may have called their principal other, less printable things — a school board spokesman described their comments as “vulgar” and “profane”; but the point is, they never said it to his face; nor did they ever expect their postings to Facebook, done in the privacy of their rooms and meant only for the eyes of their friends, to be hauled forward as evidence of wrongdoing on their part.

They were not even “bad” kids — one was on the students’ council, another a varsity team member; they were not considered troublemakers in any way. They were just doing what students have done throughout the ages — bitching and complaining amongst themselves about authority figures whose actions displease them.

Sure, kids can be less than tasteful in these circumstances — I’m sure the generic “teacher” in “Ting-a-ling” has been replaced by very specific teachers’ names many times — but to have a principal complaining that it was a form of “bullying” left me open-mouthed.

Surely bullying has to do with the strong imposing themselves on the weak (for example, America vs. Iraq); did the principal truly feel he was the underdog here? Given that the eleven students were suspended from three to eight days, one might well ask who was the real bully.

Nor was this the only incidence of “cyber-bullying” leading to draconian discipline — in March, another five students were suspended for similar sins. Their fellow students rallied in protest, and the incident turned into an ugly event involving cops, pelted objects, and several arrests for assault.

The student responsible for the original Facebook posting that slagged the school’s vice-principal, admitted his comments may have been mean-spirited, but said, “We were not in any way trying to get the message to her. We were just talking to each other. (It was) an inside joke.”

It is ironic that, just as Ontario’s Ministry of Education has backed away from the controversial zero-tolerance policy that saw students (usually from visible minorities) being suspended, expelled and even in some cases criminalised for the slightest transgressions, the authorities have chosen to come down hard on “cyber-bullying”, however that is described. Indeed, it has even been written into the new legislation. It is viewed as having “an impact on school climate”.

Obviously, bullying of any sort cannot be condoned in schools; and I would be prepared to support action against any student who used the Internet to seriously threaten or intimidate another student — or even a teacher.

But calling a principal names? Inventing dirty jokes about a teacher? Come on. That’s happened ever since schools were invented, and is hardly going to stop. Direct, face-to-face disrespect should not be tolerated; but surely kids must have some safe place to let off steam. These days, Facebook is their leisure-space; should the teachers really be spying on them? If nothing else, this raises legal issues of privacy that have yet to be resolved.

Even as the school boards whip themselves into a lather over a few rude-mouthed students with more technology than judgment, the city faces a much more serious issue weapons in schools, and what to do about them. Earlier this week, the ultimate tragedy occurred — a 15-year-old boy was shot and killed in a school corridor.

The school is in a rough area; the victim was Black, but not considered a troublemaker. (Yes, in this city, these things have to be said.) There must have been witnesses, but so far the police have no suspects.

These are the things the authorities should be worrying about - the hows and whys of such a terrible occurrence, the level of security in schools, the silence of the observers. These concerns merit sleepless nights; not a few silly lines written by a few silly students, broadcast in a universe that doesn’t even exist.