‘Foul Play’ mildly entertaining, light romance

What you need to entertain you during the commercials that pay for the programme to be televised is a reasonably well-written light, comic romance.

In which case Nigel R Khan, Bookseller, has an assortment of inexpensive paperbacks by Janet Evanovich that I guarantee, having read this one in less than a day, will keep you amused (or irritated, depending on how much you like, or loathe romance fiction) from before dawn at J’Ouvert to the ending of Las’ Lap.

Fowl Play begins with our heroine, Amy Klasse, blasted vex at losing her job on a children’s programme in a local TV station to a chicken (a Rhode Island Red to be precise), ripping her skirt caught in her car door and our hero, (and handsome hunk) Dr Jacob (Jake) Eliot, falling in love with her at first sight. He follows her in to the supermarket where she dislodges a pile of grapefruit, accidentally spills an entire carton of eggs on the floor and grabs a sack of cat litter without noticing a tear the corner of the sack, leaving a trail of cat litter behind her as she approaches the check-out where she realises that when she stormed out of the TV station she left her purse in her locker.

Jake offers to pay for Amy’s groceries, she hesitates until the check-out girl assures her that Dr Eliot is a most respectable, well-known veterinarian. Even though he can’t cook he can see she is buying the makings of a spaghetti dinner. He offers to pay for her groceries if she’ll ask him to dinner. After some persuasion she accepts; he buys a bottle of wine to accompany the meal.

Amy now discovers she’s locked her keys in her car. He drives her home; en route he offers her a job as a receptionist at his clinic.

A glass or two of wine are enough to give Amy what she calls “the whirlies” but Jake is a gentleman – even though she responded to his kiss with enthusiasm (not to put too fine a point on it). Nevertheless she tells him she doesn’t approve of casual sex and that she’s a virgin.

Next day he takes her to his clinic where she shows surprising efficiency in sorting out the mess of bills, receipts and what-have-you. It appears he and his partner really did need a receptionist.

At this point enter a villainess of the piece, luscious Veronica Bottles and Ida Bird – the Rhode Island Red that replaced Amy on the children’s TV show. Jake decides to keep the bird overnight for observation but when Veronica returns to pick up the bird the next morning with recently appointed (and low-down heel) station manager Brian Turner she has hysterics when she’s told the bird is missing.

The TV cameras are on the spot to record this horrifying, red-hot piece of local news. Amy is accused of bird-napping. She and Jake set out to solve the crime. Amy loses her virginity in the process – and all, of course, ends happily.

Well, OK so Fowl Play is the lightest of light romances, but I had a giggle or two along the way as I read it (not having anything else to review for Newsday that week), so I can assure you there are many worse writers published – even though the ending is a mite contrived.

So, if you’re into romance after Carnival is over and done with and you’ve left it too late to go to Nigel Khan Bookseller to buy this entertainment to read during the national fete, I’m sure you’ll enjoy any one of New York Times’ best selling writer Janet Evanovich’s books if they’re as mildly entertaining as Fowl Play.