Celebrate your years of Wedded bliss

Can you imagine a more beautiful scene than children watching their parents joining hands and hearts as they affirm the magnitude and strength of their enduring love?

Vow renewal ceremonies can be as creative and personal as you want them to be. Walk down the aisle to classical music and walk out to "your song." Let the cover of your invitation feature your first wedding portrait. Play your original wedding video at your reception. Buy new wedding bands for the occasion and have them specially engraved. Your ceremony can be very formal, or more casual and fun. It can completely reflect who you are.

Significant anniversaries are especially appropriate times for renewing your commitment and love.

Some couples choose to renew their vows after a particularly difficult crisis in their lives, say for example, the overcoming of a serious illness or a period of estrangement. They want to make it new again! Others simply want to reaffirm the tremendous love that has matured and deepened with the passing of years.

Vow renewals are usually conducted by clergy since they are generally more spiritual and not official in nature. The ceremony can be conducted in churches, chapels, temples, banquet facilities, on yachts, out of doors or in the privacy of a couple’s home. Consider reaffirming your vows in some far off, exotic destination!

The couples themselves often host the celebration because it is so very personal. It is a decision that only you as a couple can make.

Some couples elect to repeat the very same vows that they used on their wedding days. Others choose vows that reflect a mature love blessed with all the joys and tribulations of years.

A couple can end their vows with a poem, for example, this verse by James Weldon Johnson:

"The world, for me, and all the world can hold is circled in your arms, for me their lies within the lights and shadows of your eyes the only beauty that is never old."

A minister may state the following "Declaration of Intent" before the couple takes the standard wedding vows:

"When you first joined hands and hearts 40 years ago, you did not know where life would take you. You promised to love, honour and cherish one another through all things. Life has surely brought you both wonderful blessings and difficult tribulations. Therefore, you have fulfilled your promise. And God is smiling! So, as you come here today to reaffirm your wedding vows and as you reflect on all the years as husband and wife, do you now reaffirm the vows you took 40 years ago? If so, repeat after me."

The following was adapted from Diane Warner’s Complete Book of Wedding Vows. A couple may say these words to one another just before they take the vows of their choice.

"You are mine, my love, and I am yours, as ordained by God from the beginning of time. God brought us together, kept us together. You are God’s gift to me, my priceless treasure, my blessing for life. May God bless us as we come together before our family and friends to renew our pledge of love to one another, eternal."

Writing your own vows would be most appropriate as well. Try the following to help you with the writing of your personalised wedding vows:

- Go through a book of vows and jot down all the words and phrases you like on a piece of paper.

- Answer these questions:

How do I love my wife/husband? How has our love grown over the years?

How has my husband/wife made me a better person?

For what am I most grateful to my wife/husband? What is my pledge to him/her for the future?

Equipped with the research and their answers, a couple is often better able to express what is in their heart. Remember that love brings even the most reticent tongue to verse! Also, in answering these questions, you are creating a precious document. How often do we take the time to complete such an exercise? You will cherish these words for the rest of your lives — and perhaps can even pass it along to your children one day.

One final piece of advice: Include the children and grandchildren! Have the elder teenage boy/s walk mom down the aisle. Your daughter may be your maid of honour, or have all the grandchildren process down the aisle before you — boys ringing hand bells and girls sprinkling flower petals. A marriage vow renewal is a family affair! One unique couple had their entire original bridal party reunited for the occasion.

However, whenever, wherever you choose to do a vow renewal — remember that more than the flowers or ribbons or fancy clothes, it is the love in your heart that creates the beauty and majesty. After all, it is love that brought and kept you together all these years.