Why make plans for life?

It took a conversation with my young cousins, ages 13 and 10, to open my eyes, and it hit me like a tonne of bricks.

From the time I knew myself I have had dreams and plans for my future. Some of them I have realised others I have not.

Some I am in the process of realising and some I may be realising but just cannot accept that it is happening because of fear of disappointment if it falls through.

I have always planned for things. I think it is something innate or possibly inherited.

My grandfather, if he had to go to town would prepare at least two days in advance.

That, however, is not surprising since in his day they travelled by donkey or extremely slow cars.

Although technology and modernisation are in my favour, I have that same trait.

If things went the way they were supposed to…sorry, if things go the way I want them to, I would complete studying in the next two to three years, then I would be married in the next three years to a handsome, intelligent, understanding man (well we know now that if I continue with such high standards I will never get married).

After that, I would have children and would have made enough money so that I can stay at home with each child for the first three years of his/her life.

Well those are just dreams and are in no way possible right now. I’m way behind time with respect to my plans.

Isn’t it disappointing knowing you can never be certain that things will go the way you planned?

Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t go about planning for your future, because according to a friend of mine a plan is the most important part of progress. I am just questioning whether it really makes sense planning, because my experience so far is that something always comes up to test my faith and something always comes up to make my journey more difficult.

Things come up and make us change our goals.

My goals and dreams have altered over the years. Sometimes some people have come along in my life and made me rethink and reconsider certain things in life … things I once believed in, things I once held firmly in my mind.

I remember making a vow once, to myself and promising to never break that vow. I once promised myself to never let anyone in my life, to never let anyone into my heart and just like that without even noticing I let my guard down. Without even realising it I broke that promise that I made to myself.

Things happen in life and it makes us change our course. No one knows how or why it happened but these are things we just have to accept and move on. We have to learn to adjust to each and every situation with which we are presented.

Where I am today I never thought I would be, but like my mother always says "God works in mysterious ways."

I have no regrets being here at this point.

Although at times I feel incomplete, responses from you make me realise that we are where we are for a reason.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank the prisoner who wrote to me. I know now that I was able to do something I never thought I could have done.

No matter where we are, what pain we are facing and no matter how bad it seems, we have to remember that there is a reason. I sometimes struggle to remember this and I need others to remind me of this at the most trying moments in my life.

"In time" is what they all say, but they seem to forget that time can be a real pain.

My decision after all these brain racking thoughts is that planning makes sense.

It is just important, however, that along the way to reach our goals and realise our dreams that we don’t let the other things get us down.

I have decided to make a plan and stick to it, and I have also decided to make the best of whatever comes my way and inculcate it in my plan.